Wonder
Wonder
To have a wish or desire to know something; to be filled with curiosity.
My greatest pastime used to consist of wondering. My most popular saying was perhaps "what if...". I would spend countless hours reflecting on certain situations, questioning the different outcomes and contemplating how better or worse off I could possibly be. This would explain my fixation with movies such as "Sliding Doors", "Big Business" and "Family Man". What a silly pastime! With total disregard of the fact that I was and currently am living in God's Will, I chose to stimulate myself with rambling thoughts and endless fantasies. Don't get me wrong, it was always tons of fun, but what was it that I thought I was accomplishing...
This is my life. Right here, right now - this is it. I have realized that no matter how much I try to dream up different outcomes of my past, present and future, this life that I have will remain the same - past, present and future. I have made the choices that have brought me here. I believe that the Lord has guided me throughout it all (most of it at least) and I have accepted that this is the best scenario that I could be in.
"What's next?", I wonder. First of all, let me change that to "what's next?", I trust. I trust that nothing but good lies before me, whatever package it comes in. I expect that I will continue to be taken care of, just as I always have been. I know that I will not possess all of the answers to the questions that I allow to haunt me, but I have faith in knowing that peace is the best answer possibly given.
So, for today, rather than wondering "what if", I choose to accept right now. Tomorrow will come, I will let it worry about itself. Yesterday has gone and perhaps I should let it fade away.
"Abroad to see wonders the traveler goes, and neglects the fine things which lie under his nose."
- German Proverb
To have a wish or desire to know something; to be filled with curiosity.
My greatest pastime used to consist of wondering. My most popular saying was perhaps "what if...". I would spend countless hours reflecting on certain situations, questioning the different outcomes and contemplating how better or worse off I could possibly be. This would explain my fixation with movies such as "Sliding Doors", "Big Business" and "Family Man". What a silly pastime! With total disregard of the fact that I was and currently am living in God's Will, I chose to stimulate myself with rambling thoughts and endless fantasies. Don't get me wrong, it was always tons of fun, but what was it that I thought I was accomplishing...
This is my life. Right here, right now - this is it. I have realized that no matter how much I try to dream up different outcomes of my past, present and future, this life that I have will remain the same - past, present and future. I have made the choices that have brought me here. I believe that the Lord has guided me throughout it all (most of it at least) and I have accepted that this is the best scenario that I could be in.
"What's next?", I wonder. First of all, let me change that to "what's next?", I trust. I trust that nothing but good lies before me, whatever package it comes in. I expect that I will continue to be taken care of, just as I always have been. I know that I will not possess all of the answers to the questions that I allow to haunt me, but I have faith in knowing that peace is the best answer possibly given.
So, for today, rather than wondering "what if", I choose to accept right now. Tomorrow will come, I will let it worry about itself. Yesterday has gone and perhaps I should let it fade away.
"Abroad to see wonders the traveler goes, and neglects the fine things which lie under his nose."
- German Proverb
posted by Karyn at 1:19 AM
1 Comments:
I remember those days of endless ponderings...I'm pretty sure that even with my thoughts soaring into nowhere I managed to come back down hard with a bang! I never could imagine gravity away, darn it!
I'm glad you're blogging Karyn, I've missed you :)
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